to wrap up 2010.
2010 is a very nice number. a nice year to become 18, to be free from the rote and even slightly mindless learning that is the A-levels, among many other things. without a doubt, 2010 has been a year that is happening, not so much in the hip/party/fun sense but rather that it has been a great year of experience.
school lessons have not had much going, as A-level year is essentially revision revision and more revision. but the humorous teachers have made the classrooms a warmer and more friendly place, much unlike what the cold bleak dull walls and windows and chairs and tables would suggest.
A-level preparation period was probably one of the most gruelling and mentally challenging periods ever; the frequent struggle against that extra moment of lying on the bed (which almost always guaranteed a one-way trip to sleepyland for hours), that extra moment on facebook/msn/youtube to name a few was not easy for me. not to mention dealing with the ever-present fear of results not turning out well, screwing up certain papers and whatnot. it has been quite the experience.
coming to As, i have to admit there were messed up moments where i felt horrible, because not many others seemed to be in my predicament. what's done is done though.
as for CCAs, the entre fever or activity died down a little bit, probably because there were only 5 months to go in our term. without much of competitions or events to participate in, the weekly meetings did start to get a little dry. but organising entre camp and being facilitators alongside the rest of the club members was a nice experience.
i don't know if this is the XXXth time i'm speaking about npcc but, it's probably one of those things that i will come to remember about my school life if nothing else. my 6th year here didn't pass by too cheerfully; there were major frustrations at the lack of motivation and interest in the cadets, but admittedly they are not all to blame. idealistic me probably came to expect too much from mere 16 year olds who often don't quite know what they want to do (how many of them do you see fervently pursuing a laudable goal anyway?).
some other lessons learnt were that i'm not a great leader (much as i would like to think i am) and there is huge room for improvement. nevertheless, i am thankful for the enthusiasm that i possessed to forge ahead and strive to pioneer some ambitious things in the unit while i had the time/energy/chance to. the past 2 years as a cadet inspector really taught me invaluably organisation and planning, teamwork and respect, perseverance and keeping your goal in mind and of course not letting your dreams fade away.
it may be idealistic me at work again, but i have decided to extend my term as CI until my uni years. there will be many who say that i'm hopelessly silly to waste my youth away on such "meaningless" things, trying to get 13-16 year olds to see some greater purpose in stamping their feet, marching around on the field, tying knots and lashings and all that. but i feel that many of us don't bother to look hard enough into things and as a result miss out on many things that we could have done and could have learnt. for myself, i can see potential in the unit and i'm taking the chance to do something big where i can; i don't see why i shouldn't try. plus if i don't, i'm not doing justice to my uniform and drill cane by leaving them at home to collect dust am i!
if there is one thing that i took away most from this year, it would have to about love. love not in the mere BGR sense but love in a pure sense, that of showing care and concern for those around you, the thing about loving-thy-neighbour and even thy enemy, and so on. i am thankful for the heart of love that i have come to develop over the year and on hindsight this personal growth has been truly evident in my interactions with people, in the steps i've taken to reach out to others. like a friend said, there is still much more to go for me. but that does not change the fact that this is love that is patient, love that is kind, and love that never dies.
even though there are many times that the notion slips my mind, i am ever grateful for the fact that on the fateful day of 23 january a friend helped me to experience such love as never experienced before. if you know what i mean and have experienced it for yourself, i'm happy for you. if you don't, well there reasons why some things are divulged here and similarly why others are not. the best way to find out is to ask yours truly.
a few friends ask me why i have been so on about organising gatherings and outings in this period of time. i almost find that question silly. the reason? we only have so much time each day, each week, each month, each year, each lifetime. things like sleep, meals, rest, work inevitably consume time. when you subtract these things, how many hours do you have left every day and what do you typically spend them on? post A levels period is probably the only time in your life where you have greatly reduced burdens weighing on your shoulders. to me life isn't life when there are no friends. you really never know when you can next meet up with so and so person. please don't leave it to fate or things like that, pick up some initiative and do some things together you have not before - heart to heart conversations are a good start. friends don't have to come together only to play or to do crazy things, they can just as readily come together to share their weals and woes, talk about everything under the sun, and just enjoy the company (even in silence).
i have this feeling that the post above doesn't even encapsulate the surface of what 2010 was for me, but then again if words were so powerful we wouldn't have a need for human experience. in a little less than 24 hours the world will be welcoming the year 2011 and a new year promises new joys, tears and surprises alike. greet 2011 with a big wide smile knowing that God will provide!
school lessons have not had much going, as A-level year is essentially revision revision and more revision. but the humorous teachers have made the classrooms a warmer and more friendly place, much unlike what the cold bleak dull walls and windows and chairs and tables would suggest.
A-level preparation period was probably one of the most gruelling and mentally challenging periods ever; the frequent struggle against that extra moment of lying on the bed (which almost always guaranteed a one-way trip to sleepyland for hours), that extra moment on facebook/msn/youtube to name a few was not easy for me. not to mention dealing with the ever-present fear of results not turning out well, screwing up certain papers and whatnot. it has been quite the experience.
coming to As, i have to admit there were messed up moments where i felt horrible, because not many others seemed to be in my predicament. what's done is done though.
as for CCAs, the entre fever or activity died down a little bit, probably because there were only 5 months to go in our term. without much of competitions or events to participate in, the weekly meetings did start to get a little dry. but organising entre camp and being facilitators alongside the rest of the club members was a nice experience.
i don't know if this is the XXXth time i'm speaking about npcc but, it's probably one of those things that i will come to remember about my school life if nothing else. my 6th year here didn't pass by too cheerfully; there were major frustrations at the lack of motivation and interest in the cadets, but admittedly they are not all to blame. idealistic me probably came to expect too much from mere 16 year olds who often don't quite know what they want to do (how many of them do you see fervently pursuing a laudable goal anyway?).
some other lessons learnt were that i'm not a great leader (much as i would like to think i am) and there is huge room for improvement. nevertheless, i am thankful for the enthusiasm that i possessed to forge ahead and strive to pioneer some ambitious things in the unit while i had the time/energy/chance to. the past 2 years as a cadet inspector really taught me invaluably organisation and planning, teamwork and respect, perseverance and keeping your goal in mind and of course not letting your dreams fade away.
it may be idealistic me at work again, but i have decided to extend my term as CI until my uni years. there will be many who say that i'm hopelessly silly to waste my youth away on such "meaningless" things, trying to get 13-16 year olds to see some greater purpose in stamping their feet, marching around on the field, tying knots and lashings and all that. but i feel that many of us don't bother to look hard enough into things and as a result miss out on many things that we could have done and could have learnt. for myself, i can see potential in the unit and i'm taking the chance to do something big where i can; i don't see why i shouldn't try. plus if i don't, i'm not doing justice to my uniform and drill cane by leaving them at home to collect dust am i!
if there is one thing that i took away most from this year, it would have to about love. love not in the mere BGR sense but love in a pure sense, that of showing care and concern for those around you, the thing about loving-thy-neighbour and even thy enemy, and so on. i am thankful for the heart of love that i have come to develop over the year and on hindsight this personal growth has been truly evident in my interactions with people, in the steps i've taken to reach out to others. like a friend said, there is still much more to go for me. but that does not change the fact that this is love that is patient, love that is kind, and love that never dies.
even though there are many times that the notion slips my mind, i am ever grateful for the fact that on the fateful day of 23 january a friend helped me to experience such love as never experienced before. if you know what i mean and have experienced it for yourself, i'm happy for you. if you don't, well there reasons why some things are divulged here and similarly why others are not. the best way to find out is to ask yours truly.
a few friends ask me why i have been so on about organising gatherings and outings in this period of time. i almost find that question silly. the reason? we only have so much time each day, each week, each month, each year, each lifetime. things like sleep, meals, rest, work inevitably consume time. when you subtract these things, how many hours do you have left every day and what do you typically spend them on? post A levels period is probably the only time in your life where you have greatly reduced burdens weighing on your shoulders. to me life isn't life when there are no friends. you really never know when you can next meet up with so and so person. please don't leave it to fate or things like that, pick up some initiative and do some things together you have not before - heart to heart conversations are a good start. friends don't have to come together only to play or to do crazy things, they can just as readily come together to share their weals and woes, talk about everything under the sun, and just enjoy the company (even in silence).
i have this feeling that the post above doesn't even encapsulate the surface of what 2010 was for me, but then again if words were so powerful we wouldn't have a need for human experience. in a little less than 24 hours the world will be welcoming the year 2011 and a new year promises new joys, tears and surprises alike. greet 2011 with a big wide smile knowing that God will provide!
posted by Pan-san at 12/31/2010 12:47:00 AM
<< Home